I've been mighty sleepy lately. Mr. Pickles and I have been putting in some serious nap time lately. Though I wouldn't truthfully call what I've been doing "napping". I've never had a talent for naps. I can't quite fall asleep during the day, at least not yet, so right now when I feel especially pooped I retire to my bedroom and daydream.
I rub the lower end of my belly and try to comprehend that there is an actual living being inside there. I think a lot about being pregnant, and how surprised I am at how much I can already feel my body changing. There hasn't been a single day yet where I couldn't feel something happening. Even before ovulation I could feel those two massive eggs sitting in my ovary. Then I felt them move down toward the middle of my body as butterflies fluttered within my uterus.
Headaches signaled my need for extra hydration as my body began producing extra blood. Extra blood! And over the last week I've had to pee like crazy, apparently due to my kidneys doubling in size. I've often wondered how anyone could be unaware of pregnancy. I know that everyone has a different experience, but for me it has been shockingly intense every step of the way.
I can't feel the baby yet, I know that's not physically possible, but I CAN feel something in there. I can feel a weight, a fullness, a pressure in my pelvis that wasn't there before. In fact, I've already given up on wearing jeans. I've also needed to move up another cup size in my bra. I didn't think any of this would happen for another month or two, so I suppose I'm already learning to suspend expectations.
Anyway, there is not much new to report half-way through Week Five, except that my boobs are a little extra sore now, and I'm having filthy, dirty, sexy dreams. (Not an entirely unpleasant side-effect. Thanks, Appleseed(s)!) The gas has continued, and made a new friend called heartburn. My naseau and appetite both come and go. Not bad considering my best friend likes to tell me stories about vomiting out her car window on the way to work.
Also, I think some chemical in my body is making me like my husband much more than usual. Maybe that's just happiness? Either way, this guy is making out like a bandit. I can't stop being nice to him.
Just look at him. He's so darn handsome, especially holding a baby. Grrrowl!
Oh! One note on the medical front, my HCG levels went from 100 on Thursday morning to 600+ on Monday morning. That is great news, since it means the baby (or babies) is growing at a healthy rate. It also indicates a lower chance of something sad/scary like chemical pregnancy or etopic pregnancy . Of course, my doctor tells me none of this, just says it's "good". I can't wait to start seeing an OBGYN. We have an ultrasound scheduled for September 30, when we will hopefully find out just how many babies are in there.
I was trying to explain my feelings on the multiple situation to my girlfriend earlier today. After going through infertility, being blessed with a baby feels like a miracle. I'll be over the mooon for any number of babies, but if I'm being completely honest, I do hope that it is twins.
The idea of multiples strikes an emotional chord with me because I grew up with an Irish Twin. My little sister, Heather, was born just 18 months after I was, and I can honestly say that growing up with Heather was one of the greatest gifts I was ever given. When I think of twins, I think of that, and I can't help but want them.
Plus, something happened to me when I saw those eggs on the ultrasound monitor three weeks ago. I can't explain it, and maybe it's irrational, but when I saw them I loved them, immediately. Of course I want them both to have made it. I want them both to become babies. So, that's what I'm hoping for. Cross your fingers. It's going to be a long two weeks!