Holy Smokes.
There is a baby in there – a little tiny baby with a little tiny heartbeat. Though the greedy part of me is a little bit sad that there is only one, that disappointment is easily outweighed by the joy and relief of knowing that our baby is healthy and growing at a good rate. The realities of trying to work from home with twins was also freaking me out a bit, so even though that was a challenge I would have gladly taken on, I can't help but acknowledge that the universe is probably giving me exactly as much as I'm meant to handle right now. Taking care of one baby is no small task.
Having a singleton also means that we'll have the option of going to a birthing center instead of a hospital and obgyn. We're going to check out the Austin Area Birthing Center this afternoon, a magical hippie-dippie wonderland of prenatal yoga, lactation and midwifery. I love the idea of the birthing center, but I'm pretty sure our decision will ultimately boil down to a matter of financials. Our insurance covers a percentage of maternity care and delivery, so our out-of-pocket costs can vary depending on how much the center and hospital charges. So far, I have no indication of which is more expensive, but my gut tells me this place is fancy, and fancy = $$. I guess we'll just have to wait and see.
Smushy update: I finally cried after seeing the ultrasound. I've had plenty of hormonal tears so far, coming out of frustration, anxiety, and emotional overload, but until yesterday I hadn't really shed full-on tears of joy. I think that I was still holding back a little. I wasn't quite ready to accept that something so good was actually finally happening. Hearing that little heartbeat finally knocked it out of me. I guess it's time to accept that this is really real. My baby is here, and by my next birthday I'll be a Mom.
OK, more crying.