Charlie will be two months old next week. People love to tell you how the days are long and the years are short. After almost two months of motherhood I can attest to the accuracy of that statement.
Charlie's first month was grueling. I can easily describe those four weeks as some of the hardest, yet most rewarding of my life. I spent the first two weeks in a hormonal fog, battling through the sleepless nights and sobbing through the exhausting days, stunned that this precious little boy could possibly be mine.
Around two weeks in the fog lifted, and my heart exploded. I loved Charlie as soon as I became aware of him in my womb. Scratch that, I loved him when he was just an egg on an ultrasound. When he started kicking and wiggling in my belly I loved him even more. Seven weeks ago, when he was placed, blue and naked, on my chest, I loved him so much it hurt.
But when my head finally cleared at two weeks in, it was like getting shot through the chest. I'm not sure how to explain it beyond saying that while I knew (scientifically) that Charlie was my baby and that he had grown inside me (yadda yadda), I didn't really know it in my heart, not for the first two weeks. When my heart finally caught up with my head, I was knocked sensless with love.
Then he let me sleep for four hours straight and I REALLY loved him. (Ha ha.)
But seriously, it's pretty amazing to wake up every morning to find that your baby has gotten bigger and that your heart has grown right along with him. It's a good thing hearts are so stretchy.
Charlie is a pretty strong baby, so he's been pretty well ahead of the curve in most physical milestones. He has been rolling from tummy to back for weeks, seems to have great neck control, and can almost even keep himself sitting upright – almost. As far as mental stuff though, I was starting to get a little anxious about his progress.
I wasn't freaking out, because I know babies are all different and they do things in their own time – but still. I have been looking at him and thinking "Geez! I hope you start doing this stuff soon." Stuff being things like eye contact, gurgling, smiling, reacting to toys, and all that.
Then all of the sudden, boom. He does it (like ALL of it) over the past two days. Babies are wild, man. Charlie went from sweetly aloof to fully engaged in the blink of an eye. Until now, crying and grunting were his only language. Now he makes all these little noises to express himself and get what he wants. And speaking of wants, his are broadening. Nursing seems to no longer be the single solution to every cry. He now speaks up out of boredom, wet diapers, or an urge to be cuddled close.
Oh, and he finally reacted to a toy. After waiving an endless parade of rattles, dinos, monkeys, and bunnies in front of this kid he gurgles and reaches out for a hot dog.
What can I say? The child likes to eat.